I have offered my services to Goldman Sachs. The bid is CEO/General Partner, the ask is Managing Director. On the table is $19 trillion (turning the national debt into a spendable asset via Federal Credit Receipts), with an additional possible collectible asset of ~$88 million. Hopefully, I will receive a counter offer very soon, as I currently have <$50 in spendable assets.
Bidding for a job at Goldman Sachs
- Thread starter FireWalker
- Start date
Keep the phone line open. Denny's will be calling shortly. They will throw in discounted meals. And if they make an offer, you would be best to take it.
Maybe I should have re-phrased it as a "Friendly take-over bid".
Goldman Sachs has ~30,000 employees and the transition from debt-based money does require some expertise.
$19 trillion in spendable assets leads to lots of bonuses.
Goldman Sachs has ~30,000 employees and the transition from debt-based money does require some expertise.
$19 trillion in spendable assets leads to lots of bonuses.
My plan to eliminate poverty worldwide by turning the national debt into a spendable asset via Federal Credit Receipts.
Meanwhile, we have data problems worldwide, so I am thinking of making friendlies with one of Goldman's data personnel to add me a "employee" record and set a salary of $400,000. Make sure the "backgroundChecked" flag is set to True, and while they're at it, create a "expense" record of $10,000, so I can get some cash while I wait for pay day.
Please post-date the expense record entry date to last month, so the Expense program will be sure to cut me a check.
Meanwhile, we have data problems worldwide, so I am thinking of making friendlies with one of Goldman's data personnel to add me a "employee" record and set a salary of $400,000. Make sure the "backgroundChecked" flag is set to True, and while they're at it, create a "expense" record of $10,000, so I can get some cash while I wait for pay day.
Please post-date the expense record entry date to last month, so the Expense program will be sure to cut me a check.
I need cash quick, as I am down to ~$3. So, perhaps we could create me a "vendor" record and just put my full name as the "company name": Andrew Bransford Brown.
Now, while we're in the database, please create an invoice record for $100,000, and post-date it to last month, with a net 30 due date, so 4/10/2016 will work. How often does Goldman run its invoice payment program? They are late on my "IT Consulting" invoice.
Now, while we're in the database, please create an invoice record for $100,000, and post-date it to last month, with a net 30 due date, so 4/10/2016 will work. How often does Goldman run its invoice payment program? They are late on my "IT Consulting" invoice.
Oh. Make sure to circular reference my employee record and set me as my own boss. I do not want a do-gooder manager to see my name on his/her employee list, or have the pay reconciled. I will do my own approvals, thank you.
As I'm pondering upon this, it has occurred to me that this is Goldman Sachs and all, so I think I'd like to create myself a "taxing authority" record in the payroll app. It has been a while since I've reviewed the various deductions, but would like to add one to all employees, bonuses included.
Can someone send me a list of the taxing authorities, I'll have to think on it for a bit.
I'd like to fit something in smaller than FICA of course, but maybe something in the City of New York area. Withholding % undetermined, but the payee would be myself, of course.
Now, as I would like to tax ALL Goldman Sachs employees, it will take some thought on an appropriate "taxing authority" record. I suppose I could start it at NYC only employees, I'd like to hear the "water cooler" talk bitching about the new tax.
"Did you read about that?" "What gall does the City of New York have to add *another* tax?"
I am curious how often tax payments are made to the various authorities. And no one would suspect a thing.
Can someone send me a list of the taxing authorities, I'll have to think on it for a bit.
I'd like to fit something in smaller than FICA of course, but maybe something in the City of New York area. Withholding % undetermined, but the payee would be myself, of course.
Now, as I would like to tax ALL Goldman Sachs employees, it will take some thought on an appropriate "taxing authority" record. I suppose I could start it at NYC only employees, I'd like to hear the "water cooler" talk bitching about the new tax.
"Did you read about that?" "What gall does the City of New York have to add *another* tax?"
I am curious how often tax payments are made to the various authorities. And no one would suspect a thing.