It takes guts for you to ask for help like this in a public forum, regardless of relative anonymity. I applaud you for it. Shows you're serious.
I quit a month ago. Cold turkey - no patch, gum, whatever. I had been been smoking for over 20 years, pack a day of regular Marlboro Reds, the "cowboy killers." I was planning to quit with the help of a hospital-sponsored support group that was supposed to start the first week of April, but then I got a call that there weren't enough people who had signed up, so the next planned session would be in May. I was tempted just to keep smoking until May, but I decided to go ahead on my own.
It's all in the mind, man.
What you need to do is to A) Honestly want to quit, and B) Get mad at yourself for being so weak for so long. Seriously. Smoking is a sign of dependence to something. A weakness. Get disgusted with yourself for not yet having had the discipline or control to overcome it.
When the urge hits to smoke, either do pushups or brush your teeth. Sounds crazy but it works. You'll be in great shape and your dentist will be impressed to boot.
Most importantly, it doesn't matter what your wife/friends/doctors do to pressure you.
YOU have to desire to quit for yourself, not because of others giving you flack about it. If you don't really want it, you're just going to stop for a while and then go back to it. I really wanted to quit for myself and that's why I went forward on my own without the help of that support group.
You can do it.
Good luck.
PM me if you need further encouragement.