2022 NQ/MNQ and ES/MES Journal - Small account challenge

Today was brutal. I would rate it 3/10. Constantly stopped out which is fine all part of my strategy BUT I yo-yoed with my position sizing. Went in with full size, get stopped, then lose confidence and size down. Make a trade and win then go back to full position and lose. Erasing the profit and so on so forth. I then tried to take an ES long (I am supposed to trade micros) where I accidentally submitted 2 orders causing me to lose much more than I planned. I also took an MNQ trade that went way beyond my intended stop (I moved it). Todays losses are because of Position size errors and not respecting my stops. Had I respected position size I would have been able to stay in trades longer and would have had a much better day. Losses are normal for me especially on chop days like today but my problem is position sizing. I got it in my head that if I can "control the risk" (tighter stop) that I can take a bigger size. The problem is that obviously if I am not perfect with an entry I will either have to stop out near instantly or move my stop and risk a large portion of my account. From now on I will allow absolutely no lee way in position size and trade 2 MNQ and 4 MES until I have consistent profitability. I have this nagging in the back of my head that says "The market is going to move 300 points one of these days and if you size up to 2 NQ contracts and catch even 100 points that is $4000". That is what caused me to blow up in the past, and It caused me to take that dumb ES trade today. The PROBLEM is that I dont know 100% if the market will move that much and if I am wrong I am risking way too much. Getting a grip on those emotions and not letting the outcomes of each trade change my position size and where I put my stops will be crucial to my success. I was sim trading last month and was absolutely killing it. I also just read Trading in the Zone by Mark Douglas and thought I really understood it. Things are easier said than done and implementing the mindset in the book is difficult. In my sim account I had a 75% probability of a win and a 5:1 profit factor. Yes market conditions were different and allowed me to fully exploit my strategy but I feel like it had a lot to do with it not being real money and therefore not cause my mind to start racing. I figured with those stats I can start taking larger risk with tighter stops since I am so "accurate" and my "winners" are so much bigger than my "losers". Obviously that is not working out and I need to adapt and give up the "take more risk because you are usually right" stuff. I have a lot to improve on but I am making progress despite how bad my results are. In the past I have lost more money with less margin. However, I am giving myself a hard stop on my account and if I hit it I will wire the money out and stop trading until I fully recoup my losses through some other form of earning money. There is a negative voice in my head telling me I will fail at this and never make any real money. It is also bashing me for making the same stupid mistakes over and over again. There is another other voice telling me that if I keep acknowledging and correcting my mistakes eventually I will make it. It just will not happen as soon as I once thought. Posting this journal is extremely difficult and embarrassing but it might just help me stay accountable to my rules next week and make me green! Also it might help give other struggling traders some confidence and feel better about their performance. I will post my trade summary and orders but I will not post the charts because they are irrelevant today. Happy new years everyone! See you on Monday.

Daily P/L: -13.4% :)vomit:)
Week P/L: -19.4% :)vomit:)
Inception P/L: -19.4% :)vomit:)
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GenZFuturesTrader said:
I have this nagging in the back of my head that says "The market is going to move 300 points one of these days and if you size up to 2 NQ contracts and catch even 100 points that is $4000". That is what caused me to blow up in the past, and It caused me to take that dumb ES trade today. The PROBLEM is that I dont know 100% if the market will move that much and if I am wrong I am risking way too much.
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You are right, it is going to do that soon. But trust the technicals, they will tell you when.
 
GenZFuturesTrader said:
...I then tried to take an ES long (I am supposed to trade micros) where I accidentally submitted 2 orders causing me to lose much more than I planned...
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I do not know your psychology, but for me combining micros and minis is not a good idea. You get into complicated position sizing scenarios between the two, where you are not sure how to mentally calculate how much to risk on one ES vs. 3-4 MES.

As the cash in your account changes rapidly, you get lost in the over-thinking of it while the charts are moving in front of your face.

I can tell you one thing though, based on today's log...You seem to be overtrading. Why did you not stop at a net cumulative profit of 63 points during the early hours? Perhaps set a daily profit limit and stick to that?

Lord knows that many traders here, including myself when I was daytrading, have made good bux in a day, only to give it all back. It doesn't have to be that way.
 
Gasparov said:
You are right, it is going to do that soon. But trust the technicals, they will tell you when.
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Yes I totally agree. My problem is trying to over leverage when that does happen in order to make a massive profit. I am constantly losing money trying to catch the big one. In the long run those events are somewhat rare and by risking 10% of my account each trade with a tiny stop it will lead me to ruin as it has in the past. I have also caught 200+ points in a day. If I find myself in a situation where the price action is screaming at me I can take a starter and work into it with maybe 1 ES or 6 MNQ instead of trying to call it at the bottom/top and keeping an insanely tight stop and watching my position get stopped, losing 10% and then watching it reverse and be paralyzed by it. My best plays have been "Low size" as it allows me to sit through some volatility and even add on when I get the trigger. That is why I came up with the rule 1 MNQ every $1500 and 1 MES every $750. Then in special situations I can size up but I have been sizing up 4-5x my normal position in regular trades that were not special. More often than not to catch a big move you have to sit through a few 15 point pullbacks and with too much leverage your account can fluctuate 15%+ causing poor and emotional decision making. Usually stopping out right before it continues in your direction. I think we will have some big moves in the new year but I am trying to stop "bottom fishing" with insane size in order make insane profits.
 
Overnight said:
I do not know your psychology, but for me combining micros and minis is not a good idea. You get into complicated position sizing scenarios between the two, where you are not sure how to mentally calculate how much to risk on one ES vs. 3-4 MES.

As the cash in your account changes rapidly, you get lost in the over-thinking of it while the charts are moving in front of your face.

I can tell you one thing though, based on today's log...You seem to be overtrading. Why did you not stop at a net cumulative profit of 63 points during the early hours? Perhaps set a daily profit limit and stick to that?

Lord knows that many traders here, including myself when I was daytrading, have made good bux in a day, only to give it all back. It doesn't have to be that way.
More...

Yes I am going to set a hard size rule no more mental gymnastics with the risk adjustments. I dont like to make those hard profit targets because as the day goes on I am some times presented with more opportunities and I can keep on trading if it is a trend day or if the market moves. In hindsight I should have stopped today as the market was pinned and it was not a good market for me to trade. Some days when it trends I can catch lots of points that I would not if I had a hard profit target. My problem is position sizing and thinking the market is going to explode all the time. I am also considering setting a hard stop on the amount of trades I can take in a day. Some thing like 10.
 
GenZFuturesTrader said:
///I am also considering setting a hard stop on the amount of trades I can take in a day. Some thing like 10.
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Hrmm... not sure setting a hard stop on amount of trades per day is the answer for you either. I kinda' understand your self-analyzing. I recognize it. Poke through my journal in this section, and it may give you some ideas. It's still on the first page because it was recently updated.
 
Kudos for journaling your experience. You seem to have identified the areas which need working on (position sizing, sticking to your stops, daily limit on trades etc.)

Do you have any real time "Strat" aids in NT to help identify patterns and FTFC confirmation? I know they exist in other platforms.
 
Overnight said:
Hrmm... not sure setting a hard stop on amount of trades per day is the answer for you either. I kinda' understand your self-analyzing. I recognize it. Poke through my journal in this section, and it may give you some ideas. It's still on the first page because it was recently updated.
More...
Nice on closing those swings out. Volatility is a part of the game. What stopped you from closing them out when they were down so much? Swing trading can be great if you get a good entry and by taking "small positions" you allow yourself the flexibility to sit through that drawdown as long as your within risk parameters. It also can help manage emotions. Seems like you have done well this year. It is a PITA to get perfect entries if you want to catch big moves. My strategy is basically scalping mixed in with short term position trading. The "idea" is to get in catch 20-30 points and get out while it corrects. Then get in again for the next leg. One problem is that the market often hits magnitude and reverses sharply. Sometimes the NQ will print a 15 point 1m candle stopping people out and then continuing upwards. Sometimes you can get 30 minutes of chop after a good move and then another big move. The way I trade usually keeps me out of those corrections and while I may not catch the whole move I catch pieces of it and don't usually get caught in chop. This usually works when the market moves one way or another. I trust my strategy and I believe that over many trades it has an edge. I cant however sit out on a trend day because that is where I make the bulk of my money and sometimes 150 points can come to me throughout the day. That is why I am having trouble with the trade limit ideas and daily profit targets. I am convinced that it is position sizing and widening stops that is ruining me. Which basically means greed and FOMO.
 
Mr Subliminal said:
Kudos for journaling your experience. You seem to have identified the areas which need working on (position sizing, sticking to your stops, daily limit on trades etc.)

Do you have any real time "Strat" aids in NT to help identify patterns and FTFC confirmation? I know they exist in other platforms.
More...

Yes I am trying to really trying to stay accountable and fix these problems. I do not have any indicators but I will have to look into it. Because I trade the NQ and ES I usually know if it is FTFC or not. What would be helpful would be some sort of auto broadening formation drawer that could keep up with all the patterns throughout the day. Unfortunately I don't think that is possible. I do draw them manually but sometimes during the day I am not quick enough to draw ones that form. The only thing that I could think that would be possible and useful would be a "1-2-3" Candle indicator that can be below the candles as I am currently using a TV monitor as my second screen and it can be hard to see the bottom/top wicks on the candles. Do you follow the strat as well?
 
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