You are trading with FEAR. You have no clue what you are doing because you have no system that has a proven track record. I suspect you have not even done backtesting. Quit now.
Go develop a system that you know has an edge (even a slight one). Then sim trade it and build confidence that the system works. When you have that you can gather stats on your trades. THEN when you have at least 40-100 trades you run the stats and do a MC Sim. Then you will KNOW whether or not you have a winning system. AT THAT TIME you will have all the confidence you need to trade and not worry about fear because you will KNOW that statistics show you will make money.
Go develop a system that you know has an edge (even a slight one). Then sim trade it and build confidence that the system works. When you have that you can gather stats on your trades. THEN when you have at least 40-100 trades you run the stats and do a MC Sim. Then you will KNOW whether or not you have a winning system. AT THAT TIME you will have all the confidence you need to trade and not worry about fear because you will KNOW that statistics show you will make money.