My mother took in a Syrian refugee - and she'd do it again in a heartbeat
As Europe decides how to respond to the refugee crisis, one Australian explains why you should consider opening your house
By Eleanor Kennedy
10:34AM BST 08 Sep 2015
"Six years ago my mum took a Syrian refugee into her home. Mohammed Taha needed somewhere to live; Mum provided it.
"I counselled her against it at the time. I thought it would cost a lot of money, I thought it was potentially unsafe. Indeed, I agreed with some of the arguments put forward in yesterday’s comment piece by Julia Hartley-Brewer, who said: "I will not be offering my home to a Syrian refugee. That doesn't make me evil."
"Some people are the first in their families to go to university. Mohammed is the first in his to have citizenship"
"Fortunately Mum didn’t listen to my advice, and today I find myself arguing against Hartley-Brewer. You certainly are not evil if you can’t or don’t want to house a Syrian refugee in this crisis. But you are compassionate, humane and part of the solution if you can and you do.
"So I'm sharing part of Mum and Mohammed’s story as an example of how a drastic act of generosity can actually be easy, beneficial, and worthwhile. They taught me that compassion is not expensive, and that it isn't only for governments to deal with these crises.
"First, though, I must introduce you to Mohammed. Born some time in the late sixties, Mohammed is a Palestinian Syrian whose parents moved to Syria in 1967. He doesn't know his date of birth because he was born stateless: his family have always been refugees, even in their home.
• My list of kind Britons who want to house Syrian refugees will take your breath away
Syrian children who fled violence in their home country play with guns in a refugee camp in Jordan Photo: KHALIL MAZRAAWI/AFP/GettyImages
"Mohammed came to Australia in the early 2000s and spent eleven years seeking asylum, including a seven-year stint in Australia’s offshore processing centre in Nauru. He was finally granted citizenship in 2013. You often hear of people being the first member of their family to attend university. Mohammed is the first member of his family to have citizenship.
"I asked Mum for advice on housing a refugee. She screwd up her face and said 'you have to know who feeds the dog'"
"Of his four brothers, one died in the conflict, one is held arbitrarily in a jail “somewhere in Syria”, and the other two look after their mother and nieces in Namouk, Damascus. These nieces have not been to school for over two years – they can count on their fingers how many times they have left their small apartment, which houses ten people, but they cannot count how many bombs they have heard.
"So Mohammed lives two lives. One has its heart in Damascus, trying to get money to his family so they can eat, trying to placate his mother via Skype. The other is in Mum’s street in Melbourne. Mohammed is, simply put, the best neighbour I have witnessed. He knows everybody on the street’s name, he knows when they need help, and he is engaged in a multiyear process of fixing his car (a task which requires all of the men on the street to gather around and talk man talk about cars, the football, and the garden).
"Mum and he met through a charity program run by the Australian Asylum Seeker Resource Centre. She says she was asked directly one day: “do you have a spare room?” to which she answered yes. She wasn’t expecting the follow up question of: “Would you be happy to have a Palestinian-Syrian male of approximately 40 years of age live in that spare room?” She describes the following "yes" as a lot less certain, but a moment of putting her money where he mouth was."
"In light of the focus the last week has brought on Europe's emerging refugee "crisis", I asked Mum for some simple advice on how to house a Mohammed. Her fist response was to laugh self-effacingly, scrunch up her face and say “well, you have to know who is going to feed the dog" — Mohammed being a known over-feeder of our dog, Mali.
"But this actually highlights an important aspect of helping and housing someone from another culture. Mohammed is a devout Muslim who prays five times a day. Mali is a dog — considered haram in Islamic culture. But both Mohammed and Mum have been agile and adaptable in their relationship, and perhaps that is the key to why it works. I once asked Mohammed why he lets himself pat Mali and he said: “Firstly, she is the best dog ever; secondly your Mum thinks she is OK, and so I have to be OK with what your Mum says is OK.”
"So what other pieces of advice did my mum give?"
More >>
As Europe decides how to respond to the refugee crisis, one Australian explains why you should consider opening your house
By Eleanor Kennedy
10:34AM BST 08 Sep 2015
"Six years ago my mum took a Syrian refugee into her home. Mohammed Taha needed somewhere to live; Mum provided it.
"I counselled her against it at the time. I thought it would cost a lot of money, I thought it was potentially unsafe. Indeed, I agreed with some of the arguments put forward in yesterday’s comment piece by Julia Hartley-Brewer, who said: "I will not be offering my home to a Syrian refugee. That doesn't make me evil."
"Some people are the first in their families to go to university. Mohammed is the first in his to have citizenship"
"Fortunately Mum didn’t listen to my advice, and today I find myself arguing against Hartley-Brewer. You certainly are not evil if you can’t or don’t want to house a Syrian refugee in this crisis. But you are compassionate, humane and part of the solution if you can and you do.
"So I'm sharing part of Mum and Mohammed’s story as an example of how a drastic act of generosity can actually be easy, beneficial, and worthwhile. They taught me that compassion is not expensive, and that it isn't only for governments to deal with these crises.
"First, though, I must introduce you to Mohammed. Born some time in the late sixties, Mohammed is a Palestinian Syrian whose parents moved to Syria in 1967. He doesn't know his date of birth because he was born stateless: his family have always been refugees, even in their home.
• My list of kind Britons who want to house Syrian refugees will take your breath away
"Mohammed came to Australia in the early 2000s and spent eleven years seeking asylum, including a seven-year stint in Australia’s offshore processing centre in Nauru. He was finally granted citizenship in 2013. You often hear of people being the first member of their family to attend university. Mohammed is the first member of his family to have citizenship.
"I asked Mum for advice on housing a refugee. She screwd up her face and said 'you have to know who feeds the dog'"
"Of his four brothers, one died in the conflict, one is held arbitrarily in a jail “somewhere in Syria”, and the other two look after their mother and nieces in Namouk, Damascus. These nieces have not been to school for over two years – they can count on their fingers how many times they have left their small apartment, which houses ten people, but they cannot count how many bombs they have heard.
"So Mohammed lives two lives. One has its heart in Damascus, trying to get money to his family so they can eat, trying to placate his mother via Skype. The other is in Mum’s street in Melbourne. Mohammed is, simply put, the best neighbour I have witnessed. He knows everybody on the street’s name, he knows when they need help, and he is engaged in a multiyear process of fixing his car (a task which requires all of the men on the street to gather around and talk man talk about cars, the football, and the garden).
"Mum and he met through a charity program run by the Australian Asylum Seeker Resource Centre. She says she was asked directly one day: “do you have a spare room?” to which she answered yes. She wasn’t expecting the follow up question of: “Would you be happy to have a Palestinian-Syrian male of approximately 40 years of age live in that spare room?” She describes the following "yes" as a lot less certain, but a moment of putting her money where he mouth was."
"In light of the focus the last week has brought on Europe's emerging refugee "crisis", I asked Mum for some simple advice on how to house a Mohammed. Her fist response was to laugh self-effacingly, scrunch up her face and say “well, you have to know who is going to feed the dog" — Mohammed being a known over-feeder of our dog, Mali.
"But this actually highlights an important aspect of helping and housing someone from another culture. Mohammed is a devout Muslim who prays five times a day. Mali is a dog — considered haram in Islamic culture. But both Mohammed and Mum have been agile and adaptable in their relationship, and perhaps that is the key to why it works. I once asked Mohammed why he lets himself pat Mali and he said: “Firstly, she is the best dog ever; secondly your Mum thinks she is OK, and so I have to be OK with what your Mum says is OK.”
"So what other pieces of advice did my mum give?"
More >>
