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Happy Holidays All! http://www.jacquielawson.com:80/viewcard.asp?code=ER13610552 :) :) :)

Drink Responsibly Over The Holidays Two drunks were walking down the railroad tracks. After a couple of miles, one of them says, "Man, all these steps are killing me!" The other drunk replies, "It's not the steps; it's these darned low handrails!" :) :) :)

Super Roller Blading This is excellent! http://www.glumbert.com/media/koreanfreestyle :) :) :)

A Funny Oldie, Slightly Changed Investigators at a major research institute have discovered the heaviest element known to science. This startling new discovery has been tentatively named Administratium (Ad). The new element has no protons or electrons, thus having an atomic number of 0. It...

Excellent video clip, Don, thanks for posting it.

I had an uncle who always complained that too many relatives and friends visited him at his store on Christmas eve, just to wish him Happy Holidays, while he was trying to take care of all the last minute customers on his busiest day of the year. The custom, of course, was that he would offer...

The Wise Machine While waiting at the airport to board his plane, Bill noticed a computer scale that would give your weight and a fortune. He dropped a quarter in the slot, and the computer screen displayed: “You weigh 195 pounds, you are married and you’re on your way to San Diego.”...

GENTLE THOUGHTS FOR OUR LIVES Birds of a feather flock together and crap on your car. When I'm feeling down, I like to whistle. It makes the neighbor's dog run to the end of his chain and gag himself. A penny saved is a government oversight. The real art of conversation is not only...

How many dogs does it take to change a light bulb? 1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid burned out bulb? 2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not up to code...

Remember "Yo Mama" One Liners? Yo Mama is so poor she can't afford to pay attention. Yo Mama so poor, she has to chase down the garbage truck with a shopping list! Yo Mama so poor, she has to get up in the middle of the night and bark herself! Yo Mama is so fat, the last time she saw...

Cold, Yes, But Was it SOOO cold that Bill felt like hugging Hillary? :) :) :)

Ah, Yes, Watertown, NY In The 50s I remember walking to the store with my mother and the snow that people had piled up on the sidewalk was sometimes 10-20 ft high. During the summer, the place was full of flies and moskitoes because of the river nearby and the dairy farms in the area...

Early 1952 they brought me as a tiny baby over from Athens, Greece to live in Watertown, New York :) :) :)

and here, for those who love this as much as I do, are the lyrics of the Jambalaya song that Clarence wrote and Williams sang: Good-bye Joe, me gotta go, me oh my oh Me gotta go pole the pirogue down the bayou My Yvonne, the sweetest one, me oh my oh Son of a gun, we’ll have big fun...

This Is Fun Nice singing video clip, Don. Here's one that's a bit closer to my own mental wavelengths: http://www.biertijd.com/mediaplayer/?itemid=2763 :) :) :)

This is both true and funny! The next time you hear a politician use the word "billion" in a casual manner, think about whether you want the "politicians" spending YOUR tax money. A billion is a difficult number to comprehend, but one advertising agency did a good job of putting that figure...

It's more than just jokes, Don, it's catching our breath a bit between trading wins and losses. I'm sure you have noticed that no one can last in this business without a healthy (and frequestly exercised) sense of humor. As a matter of fact, you should consider making it a requirement in your...

Remember The Sixties? One of the best presentations on the sixties that I have seen... enjoy: http://moreoldfortyfives.com:80/TakeMeBackToTheSixties.htm :) :) :)

Are Chimps Smarter Than Humans? I think I've seen this before, but can't remember where... http://www.bbc.co.uk/mediaselector/check/player/nol/newsid_7120000/newsid_7126100?redirect=7126174.stm&news=1&nbwm=1&bbram=1&nbram=1&bbwm=1&asb=1 :) :) :)

This Is Fun http://downloads.raileurope.com/holidayCard/06_christmas_card.html :) :) :)