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Learn what? If you put on a flashy suit and smile you can make lots a ' money off suckers? As you ride the Pony of Life, you yung uns will find out that self respect is a silver bullet in your bandolere. Take a look at the shit storm Tobias left. Or Milken. Do you want that to be your...

Gotta post this quickly . On my way to Sensitivity Training. ED ZACHARY DISEASE > > > > A woman was very distraught over the fact that she > > had not had a date or any sex for over 5 years. She was afraid she > > might have something wrong with her, so she decided to seek the...

check out gainskeeper first. The numbers you're throwing out there seem a little large.

for a hundred fifty million a year, I'll suck a bowling ball out of your closet with the door closed.

Ok. One of the downsides is the money. You never see Hooker coupons in Valupak mailings. I'm tired of paying retail.

Two elderly Jewish ladies are having a discussion. Rose: So Sadie, what are you doing tonight? Sadie: Nothing much. I’m just going out with Mr. Goldberg. Rose: Mr. Moshe Goldberg who lives in Finchley? Sadie: Yes, him. Rose: Oh Sadie, I went out with Mr. Goldberg only last week. You...

Mrs. Murphy and Mrs. Cohen had lived next door one another for over 40 years and over the years became loving friends. One day Mrs. Murphy came to Mrs. Cohen and said, "These houses are becoming to much for us. Let's sell them and we can each move into a home for the aged." They agreed and...

Moishe took his Passover lunch to eat outside in the park. He sat down on a bench and began eating. A little while later a blind man came and sat down next to him. Feeling neighbourly, Moishe passed a sheet of matzo to the blind man. The blind man handled the matzo for a few minutes, looked...

Ever hear Dennis Miller talk about the "72 Virgins"? He says, "what's with that? Ok, five, maybe six virgins, ok. After that, I"m looking for somebody that knows what they're doing. I want a pro. I want a finger up my ass."

Why does society make movies like "Pretty Woman, " glorifying them? Interesting.

Brilliant, absolutely brillliant joke, and clean. Moshe was taking to his psychiatrist. "I had a weird dream recently," he says. "I saw my mother but then I noticed she had your face. I found this so worrying that I immediately awoke and couldn't get back to sleep. I just stayed there...

Poll!!!!! Time for a poll!! The teacher in a tenement district sent Mrs. Cohen a note. "Your son Abie stinks! Give him a bath." The reply from Mrs. C. "My boy Abie ain't no rose. Don't smell him, learn him!" From probably the early 30's, Moshe comes home with a poor report card...

So, you didn't like the parrot joke, but you liked the thinking man's yarn? Are you going soft on m....let me rephrase that. Are you becoming a more caring, sensitive man, who still dresses in women's clothing.???

DEFECTIVE PARROT A guy is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch. It doesn't have any feet or legs. The guy says aloud, Jeesh, I wonder what happened to this parrot? The parrot says, I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot. Holy crap, the guy replies...

Ba da dum!!!:D Jewish culture insists you do not turn away a fellow Jew who is in need. A knock comes to the Heckstein's . Its a beggar who despartely wants something to eat. "Lady, I haven't eaten in three days. Could you possible give me something to eat?" "I haven't got much,"...

The other day I went up to a local Christian bookstore and saw a “Honk if you love Jesus” bumper sticker. I was feeling particularly sassy that day because I had just come from a thrilling choir performance, followed by a thunderous prayer meeting, so I bought the sticker and put it on...

Sitting on the side of the highway waiting to catch speeding drivers, a State Police Officer sees a car puttering along at 22 MPH. He thinks to himself, "This driver is just as dangerous as a speeder!" So he turns on his lights and pulls the driver over. Approaching the car, he notices that...

Go all in. It's the thing to do.

A true classic: Mrs. Jacobson went to the gynecologist for a checkup. After the exam, the Dr. pronounced, "you have the cleanest vagina I've ever seen!" "Thank you," she said. "I got a shvartzeh comes in once a week."

Give 'em hard hats, and let 'em build something.