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Silda's thinking, "Keep talkin' Elliot. 2 testicals are gonna be on the stove tonight when you get home"

Ashley Alexandra Dupre Create yer own caption: "TWO . . . two-inch penis and dat's all."

I guess we'll have to wait til the market opens; that's when the volume offically hits the new front month.

Because of the holiday next Friday are we rolling to M6 contracts today instead of tomorrow? IB gave a change over notice at login.

Next time you use a pair of rubber gloves, You're going to smile when you think of this: A dentist noticed that his next patient, a little old lady, was nervous so he decided to tell her a little joke as he put on his gloves. "Do you know how they make these gloves?" he asked. "No, I...

A class of five-year old schoolchildren return to the classroom after playing in the playground during their break time. The teacher says to the first child "Hello Becky, what have you been doing this playtime?' Becky replies "I have been playing in the sand box". "Very good" says the...

THE PLAN In the beginning was the Plan. And Horror was upon the faces of the Assemblers. And they went unto the Technicians saying "It is a Crock of Shit, and it Stinks." And the Technicians went unto their Supervisor saying "It is Excrement, that none may abide the Odor thereof."...

Nothing like some good toilet humor, huh. Something we all can relate to. :D

3 engineers were having lunch on a park bench one afternoon. A mechanical, an electrical and a civil engineer. They were arguing over what type of engineer God was. The mechanical engineer said "Well, God was definitely a mech engr. Look at the human body; it's an incredible work of levers...

(I might have posted some of these before, but what the hell. It's still funny the 2nd time around.) A man and his wife were having an argument about who should brew the coffee each morning. The wife responded, "You should do it, because you get up first, and then we don't have to wait as...

On one of the city streets an open-top garbage truck was making pickups of newspapers and boxes. It was a windy day. The driver and his helper, who were both black, were trying to keep everything from blowing all over the place. The driver said to his assistant, "Why don't you jump up on top...

Hotterdanhell It was a hot day in Minnesota. Helga hung out the wash to dry, put a roast in the oven, then went downtown to pick up some dry cleaning. "Gootness, it's hotter dan hell today" she mused to herself as she walked down Main Street. She passed a tavern and thought, "Vy nodt?" So...

English Language It's a wonder we ever learned this language! Reasons why the English language is hard to learn: 1. The bandage was wound around the wound. 2. The farm was used to produce produce. 3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse. 4. We must polish the Polish...

Hans vas a Norvegian vorking at the fish plant up nort in Dulut vhen he accidently cut off all ten of his finkers. He vent to da emergency room in the clinik and vhen he got dar, da Norsky doctor looked at Hans and said, 'Let's hafe da finkers and I'll see vhat I can do.' Hans said...

Barry Switzer was upset about the Dallas Cowboy's losing record, so he decided to learn Steve Mariucci's secret. Switzer travelled to a 49er practice and asked Mariucci, "Coach, why is your team so good? What's your secret?" To answer Switzer, Mariucci called Steve Young over. "Steve," he...

A guy gets pulled over by a cop for speeding. As the copper is writing up the ticket, the guy asks, "Can you arrest me for calling you a filthy name?" "Yes" replies the cop. He then asks, "Can you arrest me for thinking something?" "No" replies the cop. "Well then," says the man, "I think you're...

Women eh! Boob jobs, nose jobs, teeth bleaching, tummy tucks, liposuction, colonic irrigation, botox, pierced ears, nipples, bellys and clits, eyebrows plucked, bikini wax, armpits shaved, lips tattooed, legs waxed, diets, exercise and they wont take it up the ass cause it 'hurts'.

Ohhhh I won't touch it. I can hardly even look at it. :D

I don't know if that's her crotch or an extension of her stomach.

Your cousin, my ex-wife. We oughta replace those captions with 'Before marriage' ' After marriage' Christ almighty.