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Please Hman, never say "no kidding" in a jokes thread! :)

Obama Care Highlighted by Page Number THIS IS THE 2ND OFFICIAL WHO HAS OUTLINED THESE PARTS OF THE CARE BILL Judge Kithil of Marble Falls , TX - HB3200 highlighted pages most egregious: ** Page 50/section 152: The bill will provide insurance to all non-U.S. residents, even if they...

Women! Her mother had found the PERFECT dress to wear, and would be the best-dressed mother-of-the-bride ever! A week later, Jennifer was horrified to learn that her father's new, young wife had bought the exact same dress as her mother! Jennifer asked her father's new young wife to...

Another Great Oldie A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by. He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, “Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank.” Passenger: “Who?” Cabbie: “Frank Feldman. He’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my...

Ten Valid Questions If, according to the latest medical information, 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea, does that mean that the fifth one enjoys it? :) If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? :) If a person who plays the piano is called a pianist, what should we call a person...

Always Loved This Part Of Corporate Life A young manager was leaving the office late one evening when he found the CEO standing in front of a shredder with a piece of paper in his hand. Never missing an opportunity to ingratiate himself to the higher ups, the young man approached and offered...

Yeah, I've heard of him... distinguished member of a group of Chinese pronouncements and nicknames, including: Tai Ni Po Ni, Wai Yu So Tan, Ai Bang Mai Ni, Chin Tu Fat, Wai So Dim, Wai Yu Mun Ching, No Pah King, Wai Yu Kum Nao, Lei Ying Lo, Wa Shing Ka, Yu Stin Ki Pu, Sum Ting Wong, Hu Yu Hai...

You think that's scary? try this one: :) :) :)

Wrt Business 101 “Joe decided to go into business on a shoestring, and after a lot of hard work he has managed to triple his investment... but he’s still not satisfied, can you believe it?” “Why not?” “He can’t think of anything to do with three shoestrings!...” :) :) :)

He tries to grow the Government out of bounds and dominate the American economy... He tried to use money we don't have to buy his way out of a severe recession and failed miserably... but he's back at it and our debt is exploding... He introduced major uncertainly in a situation where...

LIES, DAMN LIES, AND UNEMPLOYMENT STATISTICS By DICK MORRIS & EILEEN MCGANN "The drop in unemployment the Obama Administration reported for January is totally phony. Real, unweighted data showed an increase from 9.1% to 9.8% in joblessness rather than a cut in the highly weighted figure...

A young journalist asked a famous old rich man how he made his money. The old guy fingered his worsted wool vest and said, "Well, son, it was 1937. The depth of the Great Depression. I was down to my last nickel. I invested that nickel in an apple. I spent the entire day polishing the apple...

Jane proudly told her friend, Kate, "I'm responsible for making my husband a millionaire." "Well, how much money did he have before he married you?" Kate asked. "Billions!..." :) :) :)

The Blonde Millionaire A blonde named Barbara appeared on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire... Regis: "Barbara, you've done very well so far - $500,000 and one lifeline left. The next question will give you the million dollars if you get it right ... but if you get it wrong you will drop back...

The teacher said; “Take a pencil and paper, and write an essay with the title ‘If I Were a Millionaire.’” Everyone but Joey, who leaned back with arms folded, began to write feverishly. “What’s the matter,” the teacher asked. “Why don’t you begin?” “I’m waiting for...

Definitely one of your best, bravo, LOL! :)

OOPS! I thought you meant "Went to France"... My bad :)

At a mental health hospital a psychiatrist sets a test to determine the mental progress of his three top patients. He gets three chairs and repaints them. Before they dry, he repositions them in a room in such a way that one is in front of the other. After this, he calls the three patients...

Senior Texting Code Since more and more Seniors are texting and tweeting there appears to be a need for a STC. If you qualify for Senior Discounts this is the code for you. ATD: At The Doctor's BFF: Best Friend Farted BTW: Bring The Wheelchair BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth CBM: Covered By...

Funny fake :)