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Here's a new take on an old joke.

Pregnancy Questions & Answers & more!! Q: Should I have a baby after 35? A: No, 35 children is enough. Q: I'm two months pregnant now. when will my baby move? A: With any luck, right after he finishes college. Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex...

Ah yes, our celebs and elected leaders at their very bestest: Question: If you could live forever, would you and why? Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever...

Re-Arranging Words Someone out there either has too much spare time or is deadly at Scrabble. 1. DORMITORY: When you rearrange the letters .....DIRTY ROOM 2. PRESBYTERIAN: When you rearrange the letters .....BEST IN PRAYER 3. DESPERATION: When you rearrange the letters .....A ROPE...

After upgrading from 831.9 to 851.7 I must say there's a lot of neat new stuff. I guess it pays to upgrade more often than once a year LOL One thing I notice is the totals row at the top no longer displays, despite the checkbox being set to "display total row" Is this a minor bug or a...

I believe .7 addresses the upgrade issues from 831 that were mentioned in another thread.

Just upgraded from 831.9 to this new 851.7 and it imported the old workspace perfectly. Great job, folks. :)

But the download link buttons are improperly coded. After a little experimentation I found this works: http://www.interactivebrokers.com/download/tws40_install.exe and http://www.interactivebrokers.com/download/tws40_upgrade.exe I'm assuming those of us who wish to upgrade and...

Right now and for the last 2 days I can't even get the software to download. The links come up "Page not be found" Anyone at IB care to shed some light on when the tws links will be active?

Reminds me of the "Can I turn $2,000 into a million by the time I'm 21" threads by Aphie :D

After 11 years of marriage . . . I can't even remember what the bottle looks like anymore. :(

Right now I'm getting "Page not found" when trying to download the new software. This will be remedied before Friday I hope?

I'm using 831.9 and would like to upgrade with the least amount of fanfare possible. How can I do this without losing my settings? I have custom colors, fonts, column widths & other settings and do not wish to start from scratch.

Nice chart, guy. We oughta pin the chart to the top of ET's message boards; it seems like we have this discussion every 3 months :p

Thursday at the market open (9:30am ET) the volume switches to the Z5 contracts. Just keep both U and Z on your screen and watch it happen.

Never saw that before. Thanks, Jack :)

Doesn't seem to work on the one thread I'm trying to save . . . the jokes thread :D

macal- I remember that now. Something about changing the url to reflect number of pages=4000 or so. appreciate it.

I've got a question for you. Is there a way to save a multi-page thread quickly without having to print to file/save each page? Even with the maximum number of posts per page set, a large thread can still span tens of pages. Many thanks

That video was GREAT! LOL