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They're bluffing. They will never do anything.

Yeah I completely agree with that.. Nothing better.

I also "assure" you that you will definitely get flamed by ET members! I can't help you out but just found the response to your thread amusing and true..

Was it that scary or that bad?

Huh? Are you guys serious.. What do you mean by the real turtle? Like the turtle in Mark Wahlberg's life?

Definitely the Dell monitor. Best monitors around..

I think the Sony Vaio is really good.

I could never have agreed more.. The biggest tool around!!

Q: What do you call an Arsenal fan that does well on an IQ test? A: A cheat. Q: Why do housewives love Arsenal? A: Because they stay on top for ages and come second!

Q: Why did God make Arsenal supporters smelly? A: So blind people could laugh at them too! Two men are fishing on a river bank in a remote area of the River Thames on a Saturday afternoon miles away from any radio or tv. Suddenly one man turns to the other and says "The Gunners have...

Q: You're trapped in a room with a Lion, Cobra snake and an Arsenal Fan. You have a gun with two bullets. What should you do? A: Shoot the Arsenal Fan. Twice.

Two Gunners fans are on the plane on the way to Holland. One turns to the other and says "Hey Arthur! See if this plane turns upside-doon will we fall out?" "No way Richard," says his mate "of course we'll still be pals!!"

I've heard that Stamford Park has arguably the best pitch in the Premiership. Well...not entirely suprising considering all the sh*t that has been on there. Q: What's the difference between a Chelsea supporter and an Onion? A: No one cries when you chop up a Chelsea fan!

Q. Two Chelsea fans jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground first?. A. Who gives a F**K! Q: What do you get when you cross a Chelsea Fan with a pig? A: I don't know, there are some things a pig just won't do. Q: What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? A: A Problem...

Two blokes were walking through a cemetery when they happened upon a tombstone that read: "Here lies John Sweeney, a good man and a Chelsea fan." So, one of them asked the other: "When the hell did they start putting two people in one grave?"

Q: What's the difference between Alex Ferguson and God? A: God doesn't think he's Alex Ferguson.

Sir Alex is queuing in his local building society, when a gunman bursts in through the door demanding money. Ferguson attempts to tackle the raider, but gets knocked over...as he falls, his head smashes the counter and Sir Alex is out cold. The robber escapes and the cashier tries to revive...

Q: Did you hear that the British Post Office has just recalled their latest stamps? A: Well, they had photos of Manchester United players on them - folk couldn't figure out which side to spit on.

Newsflash: Thieves broke into the home of a Liverpool fan and stole two books. "The thing that upsets me", he said "is that I hadn't finished colouring them in yet!"

Q: Santa Claus, the tooth fairy, an intelligent Liverpool supporter and an old drunk are walking down the street together when simultaneously they each spot a fifty quid note. Who gets it? A: The old drunk, of course - the other 3 are mythical creatures.