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It's true! Elvis was just here with Bigfoot (they flew here in a flying saucer) and they told me that the government reversed engineered everything at Area 51! And The Grays are secretly living amongst us ala Men in Black. MIB is actually a true story (except for the part where TL Jones gets...

Good post. Let's make this a sticky for a couple days.

Contractors? Paid by the hour? 12.

Not to most people. From what I can tell, most people live paycheck to paycheck even during boom times. I was working a summer job as an intern in an office, and a couple middle-aged guys were discussing a coworker (this was back in the mid 80s). Something happened and he had a sudden bill...

Man, Cracker Jack prizes have really gone downhill since I was a youngster. I just finished up my second box. The first didn't have any prize at all (bastids), but I did pull one of those little envelopes out of the second box. Nostalgically, I tore open the paper wrapper to find. . . an...

Leaders of the African American communities derive power by telling their supporters that the deck is stacked against them and they cannot succeed without help. From people like Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton, Jerimiah Wright to most political leaders, the message of failure is driven home. On one...

This great economy that is surging upwards is causing riots: <A href="http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091015/ap_on_bi_ge/us_coat_store_riot">Columbus Ohio Riot</a>.

If they give Obama the Peace Prize now, what are they going to give him when he’s a failed ex-president criticizing America and Israel?

She pencils in 2 hours a day?! Woah, that's like slave labor. She's working her poor fingers to the bone! Also note that she says she puts it on her calendar. Not that she actually plugs away for a long grueling whole 2 hour session. That's tough work! Much easier just to sign up for direct...

Can you believe that crap? 79 weeks of unemployment and he wants more and don't be calling it welfare! A year and a half that he couldn't seem to find a job, and the greedy bastards that paid his bills want to stop.

$#&^ing cavemen, driving their wheels (ala B.C.), causing global warming 10,000 years ago - it's a wonder that Mother Gia survived. High time we started taxing the bejezzus out of cavemen. Anything to get rid of those dumb Geico commercials.

You guys need to check out the next Olympic Sport! I refer to (of course) BulletBall and BulletBall Extreme! :D :D :D This poor guy was on a reality show called something like American Inventor. And he is very serious about BulletBall: www.bulletballgames.com

That is an astute observation. Campaigners always talk about Nixon and Kennedy and the wrinkled suit during the debate - this'll be even bigger. The Obama campaign and administration will be boiled down and the essence extracted and documented. That is very interesting indeed.

In a way, I guess they are saying it's about effort, not results. Work, not achievement. So Obambi gets an A+++ for effort. When you think about it that way, it's really an insult. :D :D :D

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam? ___________________________________ ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? WITNESS: He's twenty...

This just in, another Nobel Peace Prize winner has been declared! Obama will share the prize with. . . a fetus:

Officially it is on results. From the Wiki: According to Nobel's will, the Peace Prize should be awarded "to the person who shall have done the most or the best work for fraternity between nations, for the abolition or reduction of standing armies and for the holding and promotion of peace...

You know the committee had to give The One the Peace Prize - the only question was when. Since it is now apparent that he's going to be subpar at best and beat out Carter at worst, the best time to give him the prize is now. It only incurs additional ridiculousness down the road. And don't...

If the pirates hadn't turned tail and fled, they might be sitting on the bow of their own warship instead of warming up jail cells. As I posted in the Jokes thread, what's worse than accidently trying to pirate a warship? Being defeated by the French! :D :D :D

They've been worthless for a long time.